I have a friend who has a new website, it is so cool. I wish I could have a cool website like that.
I wish I had published books too. I would write spy novels and the hero would eat raw vegan.
Coollooking new website 


/

Instead of going to  tennis clinic at Biltmore, grudgingly,  I went to a party.
I really didnt want to go but I couldnt say no. Blame me?
 It was at this really really nice place. Downtown.

I took really blurry photos.

I am too tired to explain.

Exhausted. It is like 2 am.

I had so much fun photographing. I want to be professional quality.

I am not a people person. I am glad I went. I had a fun time.

Ok I am a people person. I reaally am, I LOVEEEEE people

 I wanted to talk to everybody but I felt a little tired. I was.

I MISSED LIPSTICK JUNGLE AND LOST , on tv tonight, WHAT AM I GOING TO DO??? HOW AM I GOING TO DEAL WITH EXISTENCE THIS WEEK UNTIL I WATCH IT

Look at the building!


There was a few people dressed up there too but I missed it,



 Every detail was so nice here

Look I just made a panorama!





Look at doors



A band made of virgin boys. How decadent! For real!


how strange was that?





I sat out and watched the ducks walk around


This is duck land


Swim over to this and..and..tie your gondola to it?


This was really pretty to look at, it was so very pretty to walk into and look at the water
the floors were marble.







People


Lots of free food, a ton of it













Gardens were so pretty




Everything was so pretty




I am surrounded with this stuff


 Up and down stairs, they never end. Fountains and statues and darkness


Exploring at night, this photo is on night setting so it looks like day, but it was pitch black



What is she doing with that duck? How scandalous I like it.


I am very tired
worn out
tired tired tired


This was
I  left at 10 ish I watched a little tv and talked on phone for a bit.
Go to sleep. in your nice cool bed.




I am wonderful.
. I have to go to sleep now and wake up soon and go to work. To my desk
where I do all this paperwork, its like paper is my friend I talk to all day long.

Piles of paper are my lover who I am consoled by.

I page the other girls in the office and we talk quitely about each other when whoever it is
isnt there.

Ok, I do more than that, I do work all day and write complaints, answers, replies,
 just tell me what to do I do it. I will make lists I will add tapes I will order supplies, I will count return reciepts
I will pop out 4 copies each of everything and take the trolley to the courthouse.

I will ride that elevator that likes to stop on every floor and have new faces walk in every day forcing me to the back of it, I listen to conversations, its always always stupid drivel. Why? Why cant people get in the elevator, see each other and say something so beautiful and meaningful?

 I walk through the parking garage sometimes.
I walk on into the sunny day and feel the sun on my back, like I just came from a blue lighted cave all day.
 
When my boss looks frustrated I say, " What is it you need?" and he says, " What I need , you cant give me, noone can!"

I run into the other lawyer in the street on my lunch break sometimes. He says hi and I say hi how are ya doing.

I walk by saladworks and look for the guy my coworkers have a crush on. He is so boring looking.

I go to jamba juice and listen to these people talk about my life as if they know me, they laugh and I laugh and what they say is so funny, and it starts to rain, rain hard. i walk out, I run through the rain as they say goodbye, past starbucks where I sit and drink my power size OJ. I drink, all I want to do is drink juice. I look around and just feel love.

I think real hard. I always think about the same things. I think about what makes us happy. What do we need?
Love, LOVE happiness childhood.



//


Friday. WHATEVER THAT MEANS, WHAT IS FRIDAY, WHAT ARE YOU? WHERE IS A FRIDAY IN TIME??

I WANT TO BE A STAR IN TIME

ACERBIC IS HOW SOME THINGS ARE FOR MY BOSS. EVERYTHING HE SAYS IS SO DARK, HE IS ALREADY SPEAKING FROM THE GRAVE. I SENSE THE DEATH PULLING HIM INTO SHADOWS AND ALL IT IS IS ATTITTUDE.HE WILL TRANSMUTE INTO DIRT. INTO NOTHING. NOBODY. MISERY.

HIS FRIEND IS OLD AND HE WALKS IN AND THEY TALK ABOUT WHO WON THE GAME. WHAT DOES IT MATTER WHO WON ANY GAME? TO THEM ESPECIALLY? IT MEANS NOTHING. NO VALUE TO THEM EXCEPT SPACES IN THE BRAIN FILLING UP THE APPROACHING VOID. WHAT DOES IT MATTER TO A CORPSE WHO WON A SPORTS GAME? DOES IT DO ANYTHING FOR IT?

MY OTHER COWORKER, I SEE DEATH ACROSS HER FACE TOO, HER LITTLE DAYS OF EATING PANERA SANDWICHES IN THE SUN EVERY SUNDAY ARE COMING TO CLOSE.
ONE DAY SHE WILL NOT WAKE UP.

MEANWHILE ACROSS TOWN I AM SUNBATHING AND I AM WONDERING WHAT TO WEAR THAT EVENING. SOMETHING FLAWLESS AND PERFECT, EXPENSIVE AND DETAILED. NEW SHOES. NEW HAIR AND A FACE THAT IS HAPPY WITH JOY AND SMILES. I WANT PERFECTION I WANT LOVE I WANT KISSES AND FLOWERS. I WANT MONEY. ITS THE GREATEST HUMAN IDEA EVER.

I WANT TO SEE LIFE, CREATION, BIRTH. I WANT THE WORLD. I WANT THE WORLD TO LOVE ME. I WANT TO GIVE EXISTENCE ALL OF ME, I DEDICATE MYSELF TO EXISTENCE, TO LIFE I SIGN MY LIFE AWAY IN ITS SERVICE. I SELL MY SOUL TO THE WORLD. ITS ALL YOURS. ITS FOR YOU.



ALL OF THIS IS FOR YOU, NOONE ELSE. MY LIFE IS YOURS, YOU OWN ME.
I BELONG TO YOU.


/

THESE DAYS THE DARK REAPER, CAN BE ONE OF THOSE DOGS WHO ARE TRAINED TO SMELL CANCER. CAN YOU TRAIN A DOG TO SMELL DEATH? WHAT IF THAT DOG CAME UP TO YOU? YOU WOULD LOOK AT THIS DOG WITH HIS BIG EYES SMILING, FRIENDLY, NUDGING YOUR CHEEK. HOW NICE. ITS NOT THE PUPPIES FAULT.

OK I FEEL IF ANYTHING IS DYING IT HAS TO BE ME, I WANT TO BE REBORN. REBORN INTO A GODDESS HERE ON EARTH ALIVE AND WELL.

/

purpose other than what i am going to eat next.

I found these I took of Washington DC








P Street Whole Foods




Dupont circle farmer's market, JUST APPLES in season












I was so happy to see Lilacs


 Maple trees


Dupont Circle